Agreements vs. Expectations
Agreements are rare.
There’s something else much more common, and much less valuable:
Expectations.
An expectation is an uncommunicated rule.
Unreasonable Expectations
Some expectations for other people are unreasonable. For example:
❌ They can never quit.
❌ They can never question us.
❌ They can never take a day off.
These are unreasonable because you wouldn’t ask these things of someone you respect.
Reasonable But Unclear Expectations
Some expectations are reasonable, but you don’t communicate them clearly. As a result, you don’t get the results you want. For example:
❌ When your sales team doesn’t follow up with prospects.
❌ When your project manager meets the deadline but blows the budget by 50%.
❌ When your finance manager doesn’t warn you 90 days in advance that cash flow is critical.
You think they should know. You shouldn’t have to tell them. But it frustrates you.
How to Transform Expectations into Agreements
Evaluate the request. Ask yourself if the request is reasonable. Would you agree to it if asked? Is it something you are willing to say out loud or put in writing? If not, then let it go.
Communicate clearly. If the request is reasonable, communicate the exact result you want and identify how you will measure it.
Seek confirmation. Ask them if they agree to provide this result. Have them restate it in their own words.
Discuss roadblocks. Ask them to agree to come to you with proposed solutions to any roadblocks.
Set a review date. Establish a date to evaluate the results together.
What Happens When Agreements Aren’t Met?
If an agreement isn’t met, there are consequences. This doesn’t have to include a lot of negative emotion, like frustration or disappointment.
It’s simply: “You agreed to this, but that happened instead.”
You then ask them to re-commit to the agreement and outline the consequences.
The Power of Agreements
Making agreements is the grown-up version of authentic communication.
It requires you to slow down long enough to identify exactly what you want.
It requires you to communicate it clearly to someone else.
It requires you to ask for the agreement and recognize they may say no.
It requires you to follow up and hold people accountable.
It requires you to manage your mind.
Start Creating Agreements Today