You love the high performers on your team.
Until they disagree with you.
Most of the time you’re happy they do things their way because they get results and don’t ask a lot of questions.
But what happens when you have a great idea and they don’t want to do it?
Here’s how it usually goes:
You think, “I know what I want and how to get it. The fastest way is to tell them what to do.”
You feel clear and certain and you’re in a hurry, so you tell them what to do.
They resist because they don’t want to be told what to do, and you haven’t set the stage.
Before you know it, you’re in a debate and you start to get frustrated.
They say, “You hired me to do this job. Let me do it my way.”
You think, “They shouldn’t question me. They should just say yes. I don’t want to take the time to persuade them. After all, I own the business!”
You feel frustrated, dig in your heels, and insist.
They get sarcastic and say they will try.
But it’s clear they’re disengaged.
Stop for a minute and imagine what they might be thinking.
It’ll be something like this, “Usually you leave me alone, why are you getting in my space? You must not trust me or respect me. You’re not listening. I don’t need this.”
They will be offended and frustrated, just like you.
If they do take action, their execution will lack energy and enthusiasm.
And that reduces the likelihood of success, reinforcing what they were thinking all along.
And frustrating you even more.
What to do Instead:
1. Get super clear about the result you want in the end. Be willing to be flexible on the HOW.
2. Put yourself in their shoes. Everyone wants to feel important and respected. Remember, most of the time you love how they operate.
3. Tell yourself, “I want to partner with them to create the result.”
4. Be sure to give them context. Then ask for their help and LISTEN.
For example, “I’ve been thinking about X and wonder if we could try Y to create Z result. What do you think? Would you help me test this? Do you have any other ideas about how to create Z?”
To get the best from your team, give them context and ask for help.
Because the way they feel when they execute determines the real outcome.